Embracing the Power of the Higher Feminine Energy

Alara Sage (00:00.822) Hello, hello, and welcome to another episode of the Ecstatic Woman podcast, where we activate and inspire women in their power, in their authenticity, in their bliss. I'm your host, Alara Sage. I'm a womb shaman and an activator and facilitator of Shakti energy. My beloveds, have you ever heard, I'm sure you've heard of feminine energy, right? But have you ever heard about lower feminine energy and upper higher feminine energy? Well, it's also something that's talked about often. So I'm really excited about this conversation today. We're going to dive deep into this conversation with our wonderful host, Michelle Fondon. Michelle is an author of 11 books. My gosh, my love, including Twin Flame Union, Seven Keys to a Healthy Twin Flame Journey, and Twin Flame Romance, The Journey to Unconditional Love. Michelle has also helped over thousands of women. And she was also the writer for Deepak Chopra's blog for three years. Welcome, and thank you so much for being here with us, Michelle. Michelle Fondin (01:03.491) you capture a phrase. Michelle Fondin (01:10.027) Thank you. Thank you so much, Alara. Thanks for having me. Yeah. And this is my latest. The latest is the Empowered Divine Feminine. So hence our topic for today. Yeah. Alara Sage (01:14.142) 11 books, that's impressive. Wow. Alara Sage (01:22.454) Oh, okay. Yes, yes, yes. So tell us what is the lower and the higher feminine. Michelle Fondin (01:32.119) Yeah, so the lower feminine is the... idea of the feminine that we've known up until now since the beginning of recorded history. And the lower feminine is the embodiment of kind of the helpless woman who needs a man to help her survive on this earthly plane. And really, that's all we've known. We've had modern feminism for a very short amount of time in all of humanity. And because we've been living in this lower which is really akin to the lower chakras, the three chakras of matter, which is basically, you know, the root chakras, the fight-flight-freeze response, right? The survivalist response in the lower energies of it. There is a lower and a higher energy to each of the chakras, of the seven chakras, but what we've really been living in is the lower vibrational frequencies of the lower feminine, which is I need to survive, I need someone to protect me, I need to procreate and I need to try to get some power in this world. And to that we've had a lot of adaptive coping mechanisms that we've had to adopt throughout generations. And now we're having a shift. We're having a shift into the higher feminine, which is really us owning our inner power and moving into those higher chakra energies. Alara Sage (03:00.418) Yeah, it's so interesting to me because I speak a lot about the feminine and I feel like people immediately just think of it in that lower feminine and you're like, that's not actually what I'm referring to, right? I even had, I was on a host, I was on a guest for another podcast and nothing against him. He was a man and he just didn't really understand what I was talking about. He's like, oh yeah, the feminine, absolutely. That's my grandmother and she was so sweet and so did it. And I'm like, that's actually not. Michelle Fondin (03:13.583) Thank you. Alara Sage (03:29.118) at all what I'm referring to. Not your grandmother and her submission and her beauty, like wonderful, like here, let me help you and make you food and tend to your needs. That's not what we're speaking about when we talk about really empowering the feminine, bringing back the rise of the divine feminine. Michelle Fondin (03:31.235) right. Michelle Fondin (03:50.103) Right, exactly. And you know, I don't want to dismiss the fact that feminine energy is nurturing. It is compassionate. It is kind. And there is a caretaking element to the feminine in and of itself because when you look at the yin symbol versus the yang symbol, I mean the yin symbol is about receptivity, but it's also extremely strong. and part of our feminine energy is that nurturing quality because we are co-creators with the universe, right? We are co-creators of humanity. That is us, so we need that nurturing quality, but it is so much more than that. It is the embodiment of everything inherent in yin energy, which is extremely powerful. And I like giving, do you mind if I give an example, Alara, on this? Alara Sage (04:42.698) No, please, by all means. Michelle Fondin (04:44.755) So I like to give the example of Mother Nature and I gave the example in my book that yang power is like the sun. The sun is on or it's off. Sometimes there are clouds in front of the sun that inhibits its shininess, but when the sun is out and in the sky that is clear. Alara Sage (04:47.822) Mm-hmm. Michelle Fondin (05:06.271) It's penetrating, hot and unrelenting, forward, moving, and anything you do to find shade in those instances. Like I gotta get away from the sun because it's so forward moving. Whereas rain is yin. Rain can be hot, cold, or warm. It can be light, misty, heavy, freezing, icy. So rain that is yin is a lot more nuanced. There's more complexity. to it. But as you know, if you've been out on a rainy day, it's extremely powerful. It's just as powerful as the sun, even though the energies are different. And so when we look at feminine energy, it is very powerful, very complex versus yang energy, which is relatively simple, but very powerful as well. Alara Sage (05:57.81) Yes, absolutely. Almost like straightforward is Yang. And I completely agree with you about the nurturing. I always say that the feminine is both powerful and tender. She can be both, and she is both, oftentimes simultaneously. Michelle Fondin (06:00.952) Yes. Michelle Fondin (06:07.052) Yes. Michelle Fondin (06:13.203) Absolutely. You think of the mother bear, right? Right? It's like she can nurture her young, but someone comes in to attack her young or a mother lion, right? But she, someone comes in to attack her young and she's fierce. Alara Sage (06:16.071) Yes. Alara Sage (06:27.214) Absolutely. Yes. And so one of the things I find with people and particularly with women, ironically enough, and I had this in myself is a resistance to, you know, femininity and feminine. Michelle Fondin (06:44.375) Yes, absolutely. So it stands to reason that since modern feminism happens, right? I'd say modern feminism was most prominently brought to societies in the 60s and 1960s and 1970s. Alara Sage (06:45.826) Talk a little bit about that. Michelle Fondin (07:03.315) And since then, there was this concept that in order to gain any traction in life, we have to operate in a very masculine way. And femininity was always seen as a sign of weakness. It was always seen as the weaker sex, if you will. And so we've been trained throughout these years, throughout decades. to really conceive of feminine power as having no power. And so women have been ashamed of that. They've been ashamed of embracing any type of feminine power because they have felt this is seen as a sign of weakness. I can't get the positions of power that I want if I live in my feminine power. I can't become CEO of a company. If I'm in my feminine power, I can't be the head of a household if I'm in my feminine power. So as a result, women have been very confused about the, their role, but it's more within themselves. It's like, I need to feel masculine and I need to feel feminine. I need to feel both equally because I need both to do what I need to do. And we've become so imbalanced. We've become imbalanced in our bodies. We've become imbalanced in our minds and relationships as a result of that. Alara Sage (08:16.062) Yeah, it's beautiful because I was actually speaking about this yesterday in the recording I was doing yesterday because it was I had so much resistance to femininity, particularly when I was in high school and just I grew up as a tomboy. I grew up around horses. I was just always in the dirt and playing and that felt really good to me. And the whole like femininity was really like repulsive to me. But the interesting thing was as I actually started to connect to my feminine power through my spiritual process. I now love what you might call femininity. But it feels really nurturing. And it feels it's very different. It feels like it's coming from within me because I desire it to because I'm open to it rather than I'm a girl and I should act that way, which is why I was, because I have a little bit of a rebellious tendency to myself. It was like, Michelle Fondin (08:49.216) Yes. Alara Sage (09:11.078) I don't want to be like that just because everybody says that's how I'm supposed to be. Right? Like I'm supposed to act that way. I'm supposed to be feminine. I'm supposed to put lotion on my hands and like screw that. I'm going to do whatever is the opposite of that. Right? Whereas now because I'm actually connected to that energy within myself. It's like, oh my God, I love like putting on makeup and putting on lace and clothing that is feminine in nature, which I never used to do before connecting to that part of myself. Michelle Fondin (09:15.607) Makes sense. Michelle Fondin (09:40.267) Yeah, it's really confusing. And that's one thing that I do mention is that your inner feminine power must come from within. And it's about embracing that which is within. And because you... Alara Sage (09:48.63) Yes. Michelle Fondin (09:54.887) accept you for who you are in your more dominant energy. Let's just say your more dominant energy is feminine energy, right, as a woman. So when you learn to embrace that from the inside of you, you will see outward manifestations of that. And that's what I was trying to get to as I wrote the chapter in the book about like the feminine, the physical feminine versus the inner feminine versus societal view of the feminine, is that it's not because you wear dresses and do your hair in a certain way or wear laundry that you are feminine all of a sudden. No, it comes from the inside and the inner expression of the feminine that comes from feeling the power of the innate feminine within you. And by embracing those archetypal energies, whether it's like Aphrodite or Hera, or any of those gods or goddesses that you feel that are living inside of you as an archetypal energy, and then the outward expression becomes a display of that. of what you have on the inside. And that's really what it becomes. And then there's this symbiosis of feeling the connection in all parts of you so that you feel whole. It's not like you're acting in society as one person, but really inside you're living as another person. And I think so many of us, having received so many conflicting messages about what it means to be a woman, we were living like in two different roles, or maybe three different roles. And especially in my... generation, I will confess I just turned 53, but especially in my generation there were these conflicting roles because my mother's generation began feminism and so it was like you don't need Amanda completely, you need a job, you need to get an education and so I married someone who was very traditional but at the same time I had these messages from my mom like Alara Sage (11:31.402) I was gonna say, I don't know how old you are. Michelle Fondin (11:55.223) You need to be superwoman. You need to do it all. You know, have the career, have the perfect house, serve your husband and have the kids, you know? And I was just like, I'm going out of my mind doing this. And I felt it wasn't okay. I felt embarrassed if I wanted to be a stay at home mom. I felt such embarrassment and humiliation from my generation to say, I need a break here. I can't be the full on career woman and have three toddlers at home. This isn't possible. But it's about rectifying who you are on the inside. Alara Sage (12:30.758) Yeah, I really love that. I always say that like what I do is not feminism, right? Because feminism was so important. It was such a catalyst of breaking open, I feel like of our societal structures and just really flipping it on its tail and spinning it around. Like, you know, like you put your head on a baseball bat and you spin around and then you kind of walk off like, wait, what direction am I going in? Right? Cause I feel like that's what happened after feminism is we weren't really sure what. Michelle Fondin (12:37.356) Yes. Michelle Fondin (12:43.64) Absolutely. Michelle Fondin (12:49.941) Yes. Michelle Fondin (12:53.516) Yeah. Alara Sage (12:57.846) direction we were supposed to be going in. And I absolutely agree. It created a lot of like, if you're not doing everything as a woman, you are that weaker version that we fought to not be. Right. Like you have to be out there doing it all or else, you know, you're pulling us back into the old generations. And of course that's just not true. Right. So now I feel like we're getting to this healthier relationship. We're beginning to get to this healthier with relationship. Michelle Fondin (13:01.862) What was your idea? Michelle Fondin (13:11.139) Yes. Michelle Fondin (13:16.945) Yeah. No, it's not true. Alara Sage (13:26.798) about what it really means to be a woman in her power, not a woman that is in her masculine only, right? But a woman who is, as you said, so beautifully whole and balanced and in harmony within herself. Michelle Fondin (13:31.204) Right. Michelle Fondin (13:36.503) Yes. Michelle Fondin (13:44.607) Absolutely. And I think the misconception when we hear terms like the higher feminine or the empowered divine feminine or even the two terms divine feminine, divine masculine, or even yin yang, sometimes we're inclined to believe, oh, I need to balance both masculine and feminine energies within me so it's 50-50. And the truth of the matter is that's never the case because if you are a woman born in a female body inherently because of hormones and all that, you're going to have more feminine energy as a general rule. That's not always the case, but as a general rule, you're going to have more feminine energy. Men are going to have more masculine energy. That's just the way it goes. And it's not about 50-50. It's about... Becoming fully who you are as a woman through your femininity and like the yin-yang symbol You will have a little bit of masculine in you because the yin-yang symbol You know you see the white side with a little dot of black and the black side with a little dot of white and what? That represents is we work better When we are embracing everything that we are with a little bit of the opposite energy That's how we operate the best. That's how we can stay the most authentic and truthful to ourselves in really owning our power. Alara Sage (15:05.246) Yes, absolutely. I love that. And so tell us a little bit about the higher feminine. What does that look like? How does she express? And maybe even, what do you feel? What do you sense? Because obviously, this is the perceived future. What do you think will happen as she rises more within and on our planet? Michelle Fondin (15:10.583) Yeah, absolutely. Michelle Fondin (15:27.667) Absolutely. So the higher feminine really operates through, as I mentioned, the upper chakras, which are chakras of spirit. So we have, you know, the fourth chakra, which is the heart, which is getting to the heart of the matter, right? The heart, the authenticity. And this really, I think that's the first step. is for us as women coming back to authenticity. I believe that has been lost in today's society. We live through the lens of social media, which unfortunately is very inauthentic. And we have this grandiose view of how we need to appear in the public world. And we have shied away from authenticity. So really the Heart Chakra, it's first about... becoming the most authentic piece of ourselves possible. The fifth chakra of course is about truth. It's speaking truth. It's being truth. It's living in your truth. And then moving into this heightened state of intuition, which is the third eye, the sixth chakra and the heightened state of intuition is our natural power. We have a superpower as women. It's called intuition. That is our superpower. And modern society has taught us not to rely on the intuition. Oh, that's just hocus pocus. Oh, that's just a coincidence. Oh, that's just, you know, because we are, we value education and knowledge so much we have dismissed. this inherent power of our intuition, which is so incredibly strong as women, and really living through that higher sense of intuition, which ultimately is the link to the divine, right? Is the link to source, which Michelle Fondin (17:13.735) enhances our intuition, enhances our authentic truth. So it's this beautiful relationship with ourselves and with our higher selves that we're really connected to our spiritual selves so that we can live authentically and truthfully. And so that sounds very esoteric, right? It sounds like so far out there. But I can give you a concrete example from what I wrote in my book about the author Judy Blume, who I grew up with. I absolutely love Judy Blume. And I saw her Alara Sage (17:31.042) Mm-hmm. Michelle Fondin (17:44.229) recently on I think it was on Amazon Prime if I'm not mistaken But I wrote that she was a woman who lived in her divine feminine power. She was one of the few She was born, I believe, in the 1930s. She went through all the traditional things that women had to do. But she broke the barriers. She wrote about puberty. She wrote about sexuality. In the times where nobody was talking about it, no one was writing about it, she could not march in the streets in D.C. during feminism and the feminist protests because she was at home raising two children. husband worked. So what did she do? She wrote. She wrote books helping young girls, young boys. She wrote books talking about the things that were taboo. She wrote back to all of her readers at that time. She went to Congress when her books were banned and she spoke about the freedom of speech. So The higher feminine is, and she wasn't boisterous. Like I'm sure most people who know about Judy Blume don't know all of these things about her. That she had, and I think it was two or three times where she had to go speak about books being banned because her books were banned. But, you know, she wrote an adult novel about a woman having an affair. Alara Sage (19:05.88) HAHA Michelle Fondin (19:13.763) and this was before you even spoke about that stuff, you know? And, but that's the higher feminine. It's not that you need to protest in ways that are going to anger people, upset people, but in your quiet power, you find social change, power to change in the areas that matter and that make. systemic changes. And that's really what she did. Believe it, everyone knows Judy Bloom, whether it's from the fudge books that you read when you were little, or Are You There God, It's Me, Margaret, but she made a lot of social changes just through her writing and So it can be in a lot of different avenues and it doesn't have to be by burning bras or you know marching to the streets. It's really about owning your power, knowing who you are, living intuitively through that higher power. Alara Sage (20:13.79) Yeah, absolutely. I agree. You know, I feel like we're very cyclical beings and we're, you know, we're children of, of mother Gaia, right? And mother Gaia has cycles and she has movements and she's shifting and evolving and changing. And, and here humans have just been going in a straight line, I feel like. And when we connect to that feminine energy within ourselves, we begin to feel her right and feel the universe and feel our, our solar system and like, oh, it's. Michelle Fondin (20:24.792) Absolutely. Michelle Fondin (20:30.871) Yes. Alara Sage (20:41.766) It's breathing out right now. Oh, now it's breathing in, right? Just symbolically. And we begin to like connect to these shifts and these changes and these movements and align with them, which is so incredibly powerful. I always say, sure, you know, you can create whatever you want. You can either just do that in an insistent forceful way, or, Hey, you could be backed by mother Gaia and the galaxy up to you, right? Michelle Fondin (20:45.515) Yes, absolutely. Michelle Fondin (21:03.692) Right. Michelle Fondin (21:09.195) Absolutely. And you know, see that feminine power is not fighting necessarily against those forces. It's about flowing with them. And I also mentioned that women's cycles are very different from men's cycles in the sense of how we work, how we operate, our rhythms. Alara Sage (21:15.191) Yeah. Michelle Fondin (21:31.167) are very different and we don't rhythmically work like men work and according to the patriarchy we've had to adopt a male style of working. Now unfortunately for modern society that hasn't even been sustainable for men and the way I equate this to is that they had to have an enormous amount of energy when we were hunters and gatherers, right? An enormous amount of energy to do one thing. kill a deer, for example, in the middle of the winter. But the way society has been constructed is that with these work hours, no vacation times, or very minimal vacation times, expecting people to work weekends and nights and answer emails and calls at all hours of the day, it's like we're being asked to go out and kill a deer every single day, have that amount of energy and focus. And unfortunately, that's not the way women operate. That's not the way we work. And we work in a very cyclical manner. Alara Sage (22:33.514) Yes. Michelle Fondin (22:34.059) But the funny thing is, COVID changed all of that. Because before when women were asking, can I get off work at six o'clock to go get my kid from daycare? The answer was no. Or can I work from home part time? The answer was no, you have to be in the office like everybody else. But guess what, COVID was the equalizer that brought everyone home and said, let's work according to home hours. So as we're shifting away from the patriarchy, things are also shifting to honor the more feminine flow of energy, which I find beautiful. Alara Sage (23:12.266) Absolutely. It's so much more nourishing, isn't it? And because it is, there's a flow to it, just like the ocean, there's an ebb and there's a flow and both of them are so important. One is not better than the other. I think, you know, in the patriarchal society and what you're referring to, we've just been like flow, but like the ebb can be so delicious. And when we really honor the ebb, it makes our flow more potent and more powerful. Michelle Fondin (23:15.283) Absolutely. Michelle Fondin (23:34.776) Yes. Alara Sage (23:39.678) And honestly, a lot more fun, because you just got to ebb. You're ready for the flow. Michelle Fondin (23:42.402) Yeah. Well, the thing is, we've found that in working in a very yang linear fashion, we've been depleted of energy because we aren't receiving. It's all about the giving, the giving, the giving. And many of us are suffering from autoimmune diseases as a result of it. Many of us are suffering from anxiety and depression as a result of it. And that really comes from you not honoring your body, right? It's like, well, you're like, well, society's not letting me honor my body. Sure, I agree. But we need to be able to take back some of that power. And I believe the way we work now is shifting in favor of us being able to honor our bodies a little bit more. Alara Sage (24:29.022) Absolutely. And I have to bring something up because it's something I talk about a lot and you kind of alluded to it. And you know, this is all in healthy debating, right? And you mentioned the heart and the pineal gland, right? Which yes, absolutely, working from our heart and utilizing our pineal gland. One of the things I speak of a lot is, you know, the sacral chakra. And for women, our wombs, right? I mean, our wombs are so beautiful. How they are literally a... Michelle Fondin (24:39.885) Of course. Alara Sage (24:58.698) portal from etheric into physical energy. They literally can create life. And I find in the spiritual community, there's all this talk about the heart. There's all this talk about the pineal gland. But who talks about the womb and who talks about the pussy, right? And Michelle Fondin (25:02.676) Absolutely. Michelle Fondin (25:12.732) Actually, I have a subsection in a chapter called the womb of creation, that you are the womb of creation, literally, as a woman. You are the womb of creation. So I'm going to take a little stance that might ruffle some feathers here. Yeah. On you are the womb of creation. So Alara Sage (25:17.858) Beautiful. Alara Sage (25:22.587) Yes, yes, yes. Alara Sage (25:30.419) Absolutely, let's go, let's ruffle. Michelle Fondin (25:35.703) This is not a political talk. I'm not talking about politics. I'm talking about who you are as a woman and honoring your body. And so yes, the second chakra, as I mentioned, each chakra can have a lower and higher vibrational frequency, the higher vibrational frequency of the second chakra, which is the sacral chakra. is the womb you are as a woman you have this like beautiful power the womb of creation like yes men can create from their sacral chakra but it's not the same we have been given this enormous gift of the womb of creation whether that's creating a baby a business baking a cake creating if you're an architect it's creating your building right or your homes but one thing that has been lost in the lower Alara Sage (26:03.892) Nervous. Alara Sage (26:10.859) Yes. Michelle Fondin (26:23.175) sacral chakra, one thing has been lost is women honoring the power of the womb of creation. We've been over-sexualized as societies, we've been over-sexualized as male-female relationships, as well as among women with female competition. Just look at what's happening in the younger generations. I don't know, it might be happening in my generation, I just don't pay attention to social media that much. Alara Sage (26:42.602) Absolutely. Michelle Fondin (26:50.883) But you know, it's like, if you're trying to get a man, how soon will younger women sext a man because they're afraid that if they don't, then the next woman's gonna get that man. They're gonna send naked pics, they're gonna do this and that. And when you honor the womb of creation, you're very careful about how you act with your sexuality, how you dress, how you carry yourself through life. As I mentioned, we have become an over-sexualized, and there's nothing wrong with sexuality. It's that it's coming often from a place of low self-esteem or low self-worth. And it's almost like I can use this to get ahead, or I can use this to get the man over the other girl, you know? So I will. But I really feel that if you're operating through the higher sacral chakra and honoring the womb of creation, you're more careful with it. Alara Sage (27:50.854) Absolutely. I love how you said all of that. And I completely agree. And, um, you know, the beauty of it is it's the lower is more of that manipulation, right? It's like, I know that I have some power here and I can use it to get what I want, right? Versus really understanding our power and actually power really in the true sense of it likes to be very, very humble. And it likes to be very, very grounded and just in presence, right? Michelle Fondin (28:00.453) Absolutely. Michelle Fondin (28:07.529) at Fort Moon. Michelle Fondin (28:15.417) Yes. Alara Sage (28:19.394) Power doesn't need to say, hey, look at me, I'm so powerful. And so in the upper expression of that, there's an absolute recognition of the power, right? And there's an integrity, right? Of knowing, yes, of knowing when the power really serves all in the higher good versus just the lower self or just our own. I'm a big. Michelle Fondin (28:19.585) Absolutely. Michelle Fondin (28:32.563) Absolutely. The integrity is the keyword there. Alara Sage (28:48.866) proponent of desires, but not desires in the form of that manipulation. And like, I'm going to get what I want, you know, despite everybody else. Right. And so, yeah, I think this is a really great thing to bring up because I really feel like as women, when we really own our wombs and really move down into our pelvis, right, and release the shame and release so much of the energies that are stored there, what happens is we activate our Shakti and that moves up into our heart. Michelle Fondin (28:53.174) Yeah. Alara Sage (29:17.522) And then things like self-love and compassion just really become very, very organic by nature because our power is literally up into our heart. And then of course it moves up into our pineal and beyond. So we're actually on the same page. Michelle Fondin (29:33.508) Absolutely. Yeah, totally. And yeah, I don't want to make the mistake that we are whole in ourselves, and we must not be ashamed of any part of us ever. even our egos. We don't need to be ashamed of our egos. Our ego is something we took on in this life so that we can express ourselves through our personality, so we can get a job, get an education, get a mate even. We need our egos to work in this world and I do believe that a lot of spiritual talkers, speakers, I was like gonna say, I was trying to mix two words there. Alara Sage (30:11.566) I do that all the time. Michelle Fondin (30:14.003) A lot of spiritual people say, oh, you must get rid of the ego, the ego death. And I always say, it's not about ego death, it's about ego transcendence. It's about who's in charge. Who's in charge? Is it your higher spiritual self that's in charge or is it your ego that's in charge? And you need your ego until you die. That's it, that's the truth. But who's in charge? Alara Sage (30:21.153) Yes. Alara Sage (30:33.813) I'm sorry. Yes. Michelle Fondin (30:37.283) I would like to, you know, it's a constant struggle, but I would like to say that my higher spiritual self is in charge and the ego is there. And it's there and I acknowledge it and say, hey, I like you, you're cool, you know, just please try to keep in your place. Don't be too judgmental, for example. So yeah, but we can't, like, if we deny any part of who we are, we're denying the entirety because we are not separate. Alara Sage (31:05.462) Yes. Yeah. Yeah, and I love how you say that about, you know, the creation side of the womb. And yes, men can create, because this is something I've really honestly been very, in a state of curiosity as I move through this. And I'm always saying, you know, women have a womb and men have a sacral chakra and they have a hara and they can create, but there's just, it's just not quite the same. And not as in one is better than the other. Absolutely not. But hey, women, like let's really like love on the fact, right? How about we really take ownership and really become in love again with the fact that we have this womb. And, you know, I feel like we've always seen, oh, we have these cycles and we have to go through these cycles. And then, then we have to go through menopause and all these things that women have to go through. Michelle Fondin (31:46.784) Yes. Michelle Fondin (31:52.983) Yeah. Alara Sage (31:59.042) But like, if you really see the flip side of like, yeah, but we have a womb, right? And we create life. And like you said, it's that womb is not just for creating humans. It's such a powerful, powerful portal. And we start to see it that way. It starts to really shift our relationship to our cycles and to things like perimenopause and menopause, because I feel like those are reclamations, those are initiations, those are rights. Michelle Fondin (32:08.462) Right. Michelle Fondin (32:22.455) Yeah. Alara Sage (32:28.526) passages that have kind of been lost to our society for a very long time. You know, moving into the wise woman, I'm 43 and I'm like, I want to go through my adipose. Michelle Fondin (32:38.711) No, you don't. No, you don't. So it's really funny because I was one of those women that was always like, oh, I hate my period. Why do I have my period? And then as I was starting to not have periods, I think this is the first year that it's finally, maybe going away for good. But as I was starting not to have periods, I was like getting really sad. I was like, I want my period. Why isn't it coming back? But... Yeah, it's, I believe that we are, we do look at all these natural parts of being a woman, and they've been somewhat villainized, if you will, and even by mothers and grandmothers and great grandmothers, and it was like periods were not something you even talked about. My mother's mother never talked to her about it, you know, and Alara Sage (33:18.082) Yeah. Michelle Fondin (33:33.071) I feel like it's, I think now though, the younger, younger generations, I heard, this is hearsay, I heard they're having period parties when they get their first period, which I think is great. I'm not sure if they know what that is, but they're having parties, which is nice. Alara Sage (33:43.278) Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Alara Sage (33:50.546) Yeah. Michelle Fondin (33:52.727) but really this celebration of the power that you were given from your creator, whether you call that creator, God's source spirit, whatever your name is for it. But women were the ones that were given this power of creation. And what I, what I like to say is that women don't think they have the power within them to lead the way into the future as we are in this major shift. You do. because women have always led the way. Men were bonded to women first. They were bonded to a woman first, right? Their mummies. So, you know, it's like the mother carried that boy in her womb for nine months. if that boy was lucky, that woman fed the boy at her breast. And that is so powerful. That bond is so powerful. And so, wherever women lead, men will follow. So woman, dear woman out there, if you are sending naked pics to that guy you just met on Tinder, that man is going to follow you because of that. But if you don't, if you take a stand and you don't, the right man will follow you because wherever the woman goes, the man will follow. And that's what we don't realize. Alara Sage (35:18.722) Oh my God. Yes, I was getting bliss hits while you were talking about that. This was coursing through my body. It's very true and absolutely men and not follow in a context of subservient but you know follow. Michelle Fondin (35:33.933) But it's more like as a higher being, right? Alara Sage (35:39.058) Yes, yes. And, and I feel like that has a lot to do with women's sense and intuition and a woman's gut instinct, all of these things where we have, you know, a lot of access to very, very high levels of intuition that can tell us, okay, we're supposed to go this direction when, you know, the men are much more logical, generally speaking, logically minded. Michelle Fondin (36:02.88) Mm-hmm. Alara Sage (36:05.99) And to them, it's like, what do you mean we're doing? What that makes no sense. But when they trust the woman, they're like, absolutely, let's go. It doesn't make any sense to me. But she says that's where we're going, and that's where we're going. And so I really just totally resonated with what you said. I really loved who you mentioned about the boys being born, of course, to the mother. And then the women have always been Michelle Fondin (36:08.503) Yeah. Michelle Fondin (36:13.325) Yes. Michelle Fondin (36:29.501) Mm-hmm. Alara Sage (36:32.71) have always been the leaders. We've always been the leaders, even when it was much more behind the scenes. And I really believe that not only are we the natural leaders, I really believe that men prefer that, in all honesty. My man, he's just so happy by it. He just loves it because it feels good to him when I say, OK, this is what we're doing, or this is my intuitive hit. It feels good in his body. Michelle Fondin (36:49.059) Yeah, I agree. Alara Sage (37:02.29) Okay, great. Now I'm going to help make that happen in the logical framework of what it needs to happen to make that happen. Michelle Fondin (37:04.472) Yeah. Michelle Fondin (37:09.975) Absolutely, yeah. Yeah, it's amazing. And I wish younger women would just realize this because I coach so many women and a lot of them are, you know, Zoomers and millennials and what they don't realize, and especially in my specialty is romantic relationships. That's my specialty. And I just talk to these women and suggest that if they would just stop chasing men, if they would just stop. Alara Sage (37:22.05) Mmm. Michelle Fondin (37:38.275) you know, pursuing men if they would just live in their power and allow their quiet power to be the beacon of light, right? To be the beacon of light that the right man with the right attitude and maturity will come to them. They will respect them for it. There has been unfortunately this flip in recent years that... that women are just a commodity and they're one of many, you know, the women have this mindset that if I don't do A, B, or C, or D like every other woman does, then I'm not going to be in a dating relationship and they've lost their integrity. And it's caused kind of both men and women on the dating scene to both have poor behavior as a result of it. And nobody's living in integrity anymore. It's all about the pursuit. but it's kind of like both are chasing, if you will, in this weird way. But they're just lowering their standards, but I think it's up to the woman, honestly, to raise her standards, to start getting clear on the core values of what she does value and what she does desire for her. And that really starts from honoring yourself first, of course. Alara Sage (38:57.786) Yeah, I think that's great advice is to really question your own core values. Like what are my core values? You know, and how does it look like? Who am I? Who am I the person? What does it look like when I am honoring those core values and taking action in those core values? You know, like how do I show up and what does that look like? Is there any other advice that you would say as far as? Michelle Fondin (39:03.864) Hmm. Michelle Fondin (39:09.335) Yes. Michelle Fondin (39:17.811) Absolutely. Alara Sage (39:26.606) I mean, I think my audience is a little bit older, but still. Michelle Fondin (39:29.952) Well, there are people that are divorced and dating for the first time in 15 years, right? Like, it's hard. It's even harder sometimes when you've been married for 10, 15, 20 years and then all of a sudden you're stuck in the dating pool again. It's like, what? This isn't the same. This is not the same thing as what happened back then. Alara Sage (39:33.018) Oh, absolutely. Yes, yes, yes. No, absolutely. Michelle Fondin (39:52.479) I think getting clear on your core values and what you actually want is absolute key. And the second thing is, if you're living from the higher aspects of your feminine power, you don't need to bow down to the situations that society expects today. And unfortunately for me, I didn't know this going back into the dating game. And so I was playing into like, oh, it's normal to have sex on a first or second date. It's normal to want to call a guy or you know what I mean, text a guy, and then you find out within, you know, a few days that you're You know, and so I feel like part of that feminine energy is A, being clear on who you are and loving yourself and knowing that having a person, a significant other in your life is to enhance an already fulfilled life. It's to enhance an already fulfilled life. That's the first thing. The second thing is that if a dating person does not match your core values, you're never going to change them. So... You need to just go next, no big deal, next. Knowing that you're worthy of love and knowing that sitting back in your feminine energy. And of course, when you're on an online dating, you have to make contact, it's a give and take, right? But then after that, just sitting back in your feminine power and having the man take action to pursue the relationship because yang energy is action oriented. Michelle Fondin (41:35.075) Feminine energy is receptive. And so we've been taught the reverse in modern day, right? That women need to also take action. But if you have two yang energies head on head with each other, they're gonna cancel each other out, right? It's not gonna work. You need to have that dynamic dance of the masculine and feminine. Alara Sage (41:57.01) Yeah, and I also feel like, you know, that there can be, there can be that play. It is a dance, isn't it, with the masculine and the feminine, because we don't wanna go too far to say, okay, then don't do anything and just be chased, right? Because I think there's a difference between sitting in your power, right, which is not a game, right? You're not playing a game of like, come get me, I'm gonna play. Michelle Fondin (42:04.047) Mm-hmm. It is a dance. Michelle Fondin (42:13.133) Right. Michelle Fondin (42:16.495) Mm-hmm. No, it's definitely not a game. No, no, this is not a game. Alara Sage (42:24.311) And I'm not saying this is what you're saying, but I'm just making it clear for the audience, right? Yeah, like, yeah. Michelle Fondin (42:26.344) Right. No, that's good. Yeah. No, it's not that. It's about, it's about allowing the natural flow of energy to flow out through you. And unfortunately, since women in particular have been taught to embrace both masculine and feminine energy to get anywhere in this world. they have felt a lot more comfortable in that masculine energy because, okay, I want to become CEO of a company. I've had to live a lot in masculine energy to become that CEO or CFO or whatever. Whereas men have still, even though of course dynamics shift, but men have still been in the notion that if I need something, I'm going to take action to get something. That's it. because I've talked to many men in my social groups who are very turned off by the notion that women have become so. less than assertive but a lot more aggressive in the dating scenario and that frankly turns men off because they want to have to Earn it and it sounds really antiquated and weird But that's the way a lot of the men that I speak to in social groups They feel that if they haven't worked toward getting a dating partner Then they haven't really earned it. So they're not going to value it Alara Sage (43:26.836) Mm-hmm. Alara Sage (43:50.306) Hmm. Yeah, it's very interesting. Michelle Fondin (43:51.279) Which is, it's weird, right? But that's a very masculine perspective. I logically, I have to do steps A, B, C, D, E, and F in order to earn something because that's the way men operate, right? Like, yeah. So it's not about playing games. It's about sitting in your power, living your life to the fullest, having your friends, having your hobbies, having your interests, your work, your career, your kids, whatever. Alara Sage (43:55.402) Yeah. Alara Sage (44:02.631) Mm hmm. Yes. Yeah. Michelle Fondin (44:20.839) And when the man comes in to ask for a date or when you guys decide to meet somewhere for coffee, politely, it's like a ping-pong game, right? It's a give and take, right? It's like you hit the ping pong, you wait for the ping pong to come back. You don't hit many women out there hitting the ping pong 10 times, right? They're like, I'm going to find the ball. Where did the ball go? Alara Sage (44:39.143) Mm-hmm. Alara Sage (44:46.897) Uh, yes, absolutely. Yeah. It's definitely the sitting in the power and recognizing your power, recognizing your, your value, your worth, right? And then also, you know, following those intuitive hits of what actions to take and definitely not in that chase or that force energy. Michelle Fondin (44:53.645) Mm-hmm. Michelle Fondin (45:05.236) Absolutely. Michelle Fondin (45:10.796) Right. Alara Sage (45:11.602) Um, that, you know, I just think we all, all humans have been in force for a long time. And so learning how to be receptive and receive and be in power. And I always call it spiritual Kung Fu because it's like taking action when that specific action is the perfect action, because it's very poignant and potent when we do that, right. Rather than like flailing around. Michelle Fondin (45:17.007) Yeah. Michelle Fondin (45:25.253) Thank you. Michelle Fondin (45:34.349) Yeah. Alara Sage (45:36.694) trying to win the fight, you're very calm and present. And when you know to like throw up your arm, you throw up your arm and it's the perfect action in that moment. And that is, I think really, again, bliss hits, this is women coming into their power in general and it's not just relationships, it's everything, right? Michelle Fondin (45:40.057) Thank you. Michelle Fondin (45:56.311) Yeah, of course. And I think, like I said, for so long, we really haven't been in an energy where it's been okay to be in receptive power. It hasn't been okay. Like if I sit back and I'm open to receiving, I'm being selfish, right? That's what we were taught. It's like, if I'm just open to receiving, if I'm not giving, giving to the point of depletion, that I'm being a selfish person because that's what we were taught as women. It's like, you gotta give and you have to serve and you have to be a good person and it's okay to receive. Like receiving is part of the dynamics of yin yang, right? And if someone gives you a compliment, just say thank you instead of rushing to compliment them back. If you're out with a girlfriend and your girlfriend offers to pay for your lunch, Alara Sage (46:46.739) Yes. Michelle Fondin (46:51.167) it's better to give them that gift sometimes, right? Give them that gift, say, thank you so much. I really appreciate that. They pay for your lunch, right? So we're, it's almost like we feel guilty to receive and that's the blockage, again, second chakra energy. That's the blockage that we need to remove as well as women if we were to rise up into the higher octave of our power. Alara Sage (47:09.146) Mm-hmm. Alara Sage (47:15.55) Absolutely. And, you know, as well as receive sexually, like I just adore it when I just get to receive completely. My man loves to give and it's just like, ah, let me just like, you know, just totally receive and just be completely immersed in that experience of receiving rather than trying to give to him at the same time sexually or like, yeah, or like exactly, or like thinking about it. Michelle Fondin (47:19.575) Yeah, of course. Michelle Fondin (47:38.335) Yeah, or like, or be thinking about it, right? Or be thinking like, what can I do for this time to save her? Alara Sage (47:45.054) Right? Just really just like, oh, yes, like, yes, yes. I get in this moment to do nothing, but receive his love and pleasure towards me. And I think that is one of the things that all women can really benefit from because it is a state of surrender. It's that surrendered into your body. It's surrendered into the moment. It's surrendered into the experience to really receive the full. Michelle Fondin (48:02.055) Absolutely. Alara Sage (48:14.242) glory of the experience. Michelle Fondin (48:15.467) Absolutely. And that is what present moment awareness is about, right? It's about being fully immersed in the moment. And there's nothing closer to God than being fully immersed in the moment in everything you do, right? And that's often something that we do miss. Alara Sage (48:19.466) Yes, yes. Alara Sage (48:27.851) Yes. Michelle Fondin (48:33.779) And that's what femininity is about too. Right? It's not only it's like it when you are fully immersed in the present, you are fully in flow with the entire universe and you're not fighting against it. You're not going against the current, but you're truly accepting and going. I agree to be a part of this flow. Which Alara Sage (48:33.822) Yes. Alara Sage (48:57.971) So, bye. Michelle Fondin (48:58.703) can balance your body, mind and soul. It balances all parts of you. We wonder why we have so many physical ailments and most often times it's because we are fighting against ourselves. We're fighting against our bodies, we're fighting against our environment, we're fighting against the rhythms of the earth, right? Like those moon cycles that we like to talk about, the seasonal rhythms. But when we're sitting in the present moment, we're in flow. Alara Sage (49:11.443) Yes. Michelle Fondin (49:28.615) And there's nothing more healing than being in the present. Alara Sage (49:33.082) Yeah, just again, it feels so nourishing. And honestly, again, like when you really surrender to that, it feels so much more powerful, right? Because again, it's not just like your energy, like what we have in the context of will, pushing against all the natural rhythms and the natural energies. It's like you have the entirety behind you, with you, supporting you, moving. Yes, yes. Michelle Fondin (49:41.42) Yes. Michelle Fondin (49:57.135) Yes, supporting you. Yes, absolutely. So I am a runner and I've been working on my running. And I... Alara Sage (50:03.691) Mm hmm. Me too. Michelle Fondin (50:08.611) It's really funny because I've been watching men run to try to like modify my body position because running faster and harder and more efficiently has been challenging for me. And what I realized is that if I lean slightly into my back body and have support of like some of the strongest areas of the body, right, the back, the skeleton, that I'm able to actually run better and more efficiently than if I'm forward leaning, right? Receiving back body energy versus forward leaning energy. And I'm like, wow, okay, when I lean into my back body a little bit while running, wow, I'm so much more efficient. I don't have to put forth any efforts or as much effort rather. But it's just like little things like that we realize the connectedness and how we use our energy on a normal day-to-day basis. And making little tweaks, making little modifications of that can help immensely. Alara Sage (51:14.206) Wow, I love that so much. I'm gonna try that. I run as well. I'm not a runner per se, but I run. So now I'm gonna try that. Yeah, because their back chakras are also the receiving chakras, right? So it's interesting. I never thought about that. And I think we just naturally kind of like lean forward, don't we? Hmm. Michelle Fondin (51:16.14) Yeah. Michelle Fondin (51:23.819) Yeah, exactly. Michelle Fondin (51:31.917) When you get tired, sit into your hips and lean back a little bit. Alara Sage (51:36.102) Interesting. Ooh, I'm excited to try that. So Michelle, how can people find you, reach out to you? Obviously you have your book. Michelle Fondin (51:44.491) Yes, yeah so all of my books are available on Amazon. I have a YouTube channel at Michelle Fondon Author and my website is michellefondonauthor.com. Yeah. Alara Sage (51:55.942) Easy to find you. So thank you so much for being here. This was just such a delightful conversation. Michelle Fondin (52:03.511) Thank you so much, Alara. I had an amazing time. And it's so great to talk with someone on the same wavelength. Alara Sage (52:09.298) Yes, it really is. It's fun to like, I thought we were going to debate and then it always happens to me. I think like, Oh, cause I like debating from a place of compassion. And then it always is like, Oh no, we're actually talking about the same thing. But different perspectives and more information, different ways to see things. It's always delicious. Thank you so much. Michelle Fondin (52:16.771) Yeah. Michelle Fondin (52:20.52) I'm sorry. Michelle Fondin (52:27.115) Definitely. Thanks so much, Alara. Have a great holiday. Alara Sage (52:32.634) Yes, holiday season. And to the listeners, as always, make sure that you share this episode. And check out Michelle's book. And be sure to check out her other books as well. Because the woman has 11 books, right? Let's support her in her beautiful creative spirit and talent. And obviously, her immense knowledge and her own embodiment of her own divine. Michelle Fondin (52:48.419) Thank you. Alara Sage (53:00.694) woman and feminine energy. So be sure to share this episode with other women and buy those books for your friends. You know, that's a great thing. It's always a great thing to buy books for other people. So be sure to do that. And as always, I will see you guys every Tuesday for the solo episode and every Thursday for other guest episodes. Until next time, I love you all so very much. Michelle Fondin (53:12.074) Absolutely. Michelle Fondin (53:29.171) Bye. Awesome, so are we done? Alara Sage (53:29.48) Yay!

Embracing the Power of the Higher Feminine Energy

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Episode Transcript

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